Who shall i blame? Muslim Adoption and fostering

THE STORY OF MALAIKA...from the perspective of the foster carer's daughter;
I was 14 years old when my parents told me that they are going to be fostering. I was little confused and at the same time excited because it was something new my family were thinking of and which i too could get involved with.

I remember the visits by the social worker to our home. She came once a week, sometimes twice, for a few weeks. She talked about all sorts of things and asked a lot of questions.

Finally, the time that we had all been waiting for had come - we had been asked to look after a beautiful young girl (named Malaika for this story) for a little while. We had been told by the social worker that Malaika was of mixed parentage background, that her mother was Turkish Muslim and her father was Greek Catholic.

Malaika was cared for by her mother until she was three months. I later found out that social workers had informed my parents that she had been removed from her care due to neglect. She was placed for four months with an African Caribbean family who were not Muslims. I also found out later that this was because the social workers did not have any Muslim families to care for her.

However, she did eventually have a Muslim family to care for her when she came to us. She was seven months old by then. I lives had changed from the very first day. I remember it was a Thursday when my sister, brother and I returned from school and met Malaika for the first time. We were all excited that we ended up quarrelling over who would play with her first. My parents were pleased to see our responses towards the new child in our house.

Malaika stayed with us for two and a half years, and everyday she became more and more involved in our life as a Muslim family. Then we heard Malaika had to go. I was told that Malaika would be living with a permanent Muslim family. I later found out that the court had approved that Malaika be placed for adoption.

We were deep in sorrow when we had been told that, despite the social worker's efforts on finding a Muslim family, they were not successful, and so they found a Greek Catholic family for Malaika. We were all disappointed and helpless, as we could not even offer Malaika a permanent home. At that time I thought it was because we were not Turkish or Greek, but we did practice the same religion as Malaika and her birth mother.

Another year and a half later, we were told that the social workers had decided to accept an application from a Greek family. I remember thinking "this is terrible news", and we could not see Malaika going to live with a family who did not practice the same religion and culture. This is the little girl who was praying right next to us and copying everything we do to perform in Salaat, she used to raise her hand to say Dua. I did not know who to blame.

Was it Malaika's mum? No, because Malaika was at risk if she had gone back to her. Was it the family who came to adopt her? No, because they are two people who came forward to offer a child a future, love, care and everything that parents offer to a child. Was it the Local Authority, who made the decision to give Malaika to a non-Muslim family? No, because they had done everything possible that could have been done to find a Muslim family for Malaika.

When we visited Malaika after three months she seemed different. We found Malaika's new mum and dad very kind and we know they will take care of her. When we looked into Malaika's eyes, I am sure she was asking "WHY?" visit our website